Absalom Fennick

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Ignotum Per Ignotius

Name: Dr. Absalom Fennick

Breed: Corax

Rank: Athro

Camp: Chasers

Pack: None. Our Hero Flies Solo.

Sept: Associated with the Sept of Shadowed Wisdom, but he does not consider himself to be a member of such due to what he perceives as a conflict between Raven's Laws and the Litany.

Portrait of the raven as a young(er) man, by "Jacques"

Heed These Words, And Save Yourself From Experiencing My Torment As Your Own

Dr. Absalom Fennick is an amesiac corax alchemist searching for the one secret a being incapable of keeping secrets should never lay hands on. He is (if you'll forgive the pun) a bit of an "odd bird," having spent so much time in homid form that he finds it far more preferable to occupy over his native corvid form. He has largely lost his bird-perspective entirely, finding human-thought far easier to understand and empathize with.

Our hero was born in Wales, 1747. Three years later, upon on reaching his (raven) age of maturity, he followed a merchant ship to the American colonies where he experienced his first change in 1750.

Predating the US constitution, he may technically count as a "natural born" US citizen, but being something of a patriot, his heart will always belong to Wales.

From the point of his first change forward until some point around 2012, except for a few stray memories (he very distinctly remembers witnessing LDS founder Joseph Smith falling out of the window of the Carthage, Illinois Jailhouse the second time), his life experience is mostly a muddled blur. That said, a great deal of evidence--including eye witness accounts, various paper trails, and the testimony of people connected to the area with whom he's supposedly maintained some kind of relationship (friendly or otherwise) with for years--points to Dr. Fennick having had ties to the Los Angeles area and its local garou for an unnaturally LONG period of time.

Deep down, our hero wants two things: the secret of immortality (that is, if he doesn't already have it locked away somewhere in his overly forgetful, bird brain) and the Golden Plates of Moroni (he hears they're *very* shiny). Why anyone would want to possess the secret of immortality is self-explanatory, but it's not exactly clear as to why he wants the Plates so badly. (Thinking about it for more than a few minutes at a time tends to give him terrible headaches.)

He has no idea as to why he is fluent in Chinese.

Lies By Liars -OR- What Sane Men Would Call "Quotes"

  • "Damn it, Jacques, stop crying. I'm trying to tell you something important." --Dr. Absalom Fennick
  • "Absalom Fennick? I hate that guy. He called me a dumbass." --Some Dumbass
  • "Well, if she can appoint herself Sept Alpha and boss the rest of us around, just like that, then I’m Her Majesty’s Triple Double Emperor of the Mass Bay, Plymouth, and Maine colonies, as well as all royal holdings still located on the savage planet of Mars." --Dr. Absalom Fennick
  • "I was in the grocery store yesterday and was looking for those sausage patties that are like hamburgers but sausage because I felt like grilling, and the most amazing thing happened. I noticed that they sell Buffalo and Bison meat. This was extremely exciting to me as I thought Buffalo were extinct for the longest time. A while back, someone told me I was stupid and they weren't, but for some reason in my head, I still think they are extinct. I thought the Indians and cowboys ate them all. Well, not so much the Indians, as they used everything on the animal, but the stupid cowboys and settlers who used them for target practice or killed them just to eat its balls and leave the rest to rot.

    "Today I bought what was called 'bison steaks'; two six ounce steaks. It looks really bloody and mushy but I think I am going to risk it. I think bisons are female buffalo. I cant wait till tomorrow to try them. Can you imagine how excited I am, for I am eating meat of a animal I thought was extinct. To help you understand, its like getting stoned and thinking you have no more hot pockets and you want hot pockets but are too stoned to go out, then see you have hot pockets in your fridge, and not the turkey and cheese ones but the pizza pepperoni ones. One could also compare it to the joy someone would feel if they found out there are dinosaurs still around and was gifted a delicious brontosaurus leg.

    "I can not help but try and remember who called me stupid because I said buffalo were extinct. Its almost like finding yourself in the afternoon thinking about a dream you had once and now remember, but wondering if you dreamt it the previous night or long ago as it seems like a long suppressed memory. Its kinda a form of déjà vu, and according to The Matrix, that is a glitch in the program. Perhaps this confusion as to if anyone ever told me buffalo weren't extinct, or me recalling they are is because they were and I time traveled later in life and save the buffalo from getting extinct and thus now am reliving the current times but with buffalo meat available thanks to my previous/future saving of the buffalo, but that feeling they are extinct still lingers in my brain.

    "I am sorry; I might be getting technical and thinking too much. I had Trader Joe's fish fillets (cod) tonight, and fish makes one smarter. I found the cod delicious and not like the last batch I had where I bite off some of the breading and it was attached to a scaly side section of fish meat that made me almost vomit. Any how, feel free for thanking me for inventing a time machine in the future and going back and killing a bunch of buffalo-wasting cowboys and making buffalo plentiful once again. Re-reading this I can see I am incredibly smart today and I haven't drank beer in a while so I'm going to go get shnookered; expect low brow unimaginative poop joke posts later.
    " --Dr. Absalom Fennick
  • "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -- Groucho Marx

Malicious Slander and/or "Rumors"

  • Dr. Fennick has actually found the secret of immortality on multiple occasions, but the secret's been torn from his head (with varying degrees of violence) very shortly afterward each time. This repeated psychic tinkering could go a long way toward explaining his strangely stable, yet unstable memory and mental state.

Rogue's Gallery (i.e. "Known Associates")

OOC Information

Player: Nicholas Joseph Russell

Player Email: brotherdavethompson@gmail.com

Storyteller: Justin Searles

Storyteller Email: jstnsearles@gmail.com

Location: Los Angeles, CA